Love. This beautiful little code word means so much to so many. Tantra sees love as a crazy drug that allows a person to lose their mind. Well, that’s true, right? You’ve been there.

So how do we handle this powerful emotional experience? To love or not to love, that is the question. No, Love on. Yet there are ways to love while maintaining sobriety and creating a wonderful relationship adventure.

The first step is to turn love inward. Your heart is an infinite well of love. Many people take one direction: outwardly sharing their love. Turn that love inward first. This will allow you to be filled with love before sharing it with others.

Drop old stories and examples of what love is. There is a part of your love that may be held back due to outdated beliefs you may have about what love is. What is needed is to step into your style of love without the pollution of what we have learned from others about the way love is supposed to be. Feel into what is alive and fresh. Stay in this moment. Love is there, naturally.

Love without agenda or needs. Take the needs out, and watch your experience of love open to a whole new level. Needy energy can create false love. People often are worthy of their need to be loved, so it seems logical that if you love others, you will get your needs met. Well, not always. In fact, loving for the wrong reasons often becomes emotionally expensive and may even hurt. Let your love flow free without the agendas.

Release the idea that love is in limited supply. More love is going on in a human being than we know what to do with it. The idea that it has to be shared carefully creates a power dynamic that harms the quality of what we feel. The pain around love is this need to try to get it or limit the number of people we share it with. Just be loved. Doing love goes against the natural flow. Become the love. Seeking it or being a miser wastes energy and emotional health. Just love, there is enough to go around.

Free yourself of the idea that love belongs to you. Too many seek love for safety. To use love this way makes it unsafe. Why? Because love is a crazy experience. There is no safety in it at all. So, releasing the idea that love belongs to you frees you to really feel the depth. It calls you to wake up and be alive with love. That’s all it wants: to live and breathe with you. Love loves to be contemporary.

Love is a free radical in life. It will do its own thing and take you to really hard places unless you are willing to integrate it with the rest of who you are. Isolating your love creates this issue. Love is a part of you. Love yourself, drop the old examples, release needy energy, embrace how much love you have all the time, and become alive and fresh with love. This is how love and Tantra can play well together.